What if the most important human skill has no School?
Love is one of the most fundamental forces shaping human life. It influences emotional well-being, identity formation, motivation and long-term decisions, often more profoundly than formal education or professional training. Romantic relationships affect how people imagine their future, where they choose to live and how they cope with uncertainty.
Despite its importance, love remains largely absent from formal education. There are curricula for digital skills, AI and employability, but none for emotional communication, relationship ethics or intimacy. As Shakespeare writes in Romeo and Juliet, “My bounty is as boundless as the sea” — a reminder that love is deep and powerful, yet something we are expected to navigate without instruction.
In the digital age, this absence may explain why many young people increasingly turn to AI as an informal, global “learning space” for love.
Love without a Curriculum in the age of AI
When formal education does not address emotional and relational skills, individuals seek guidance elsewhere. AI has become one such source. AI systems are available, non-judgmental and responsive, offering answers to questions that are often difficult to ask teachers, parents or peers.
Research supports this observation. The systematic review Potential and Pitfalls of Romantic Artificial Intelligence (2025) shows that users frequently experience AI as a safe environment for emotional exploration and communication rehearsal. The authors emphasise that AI does not create love, but simulates attentiveness and responsiveness — features humans strongly associate with intimacy.
This reflects a broader shift in learning: young people increasingly use digital tools not only to acquire technical knowledge, but also to navigate complex emotional situations.
AI as a Mirror, not a Lover
A central insight from the literature is the need to distinguish between support and substitution. AI can help users reflect on thoughts, structure emotions and improve communication, but it cannot replace human relationships.
Chu et al. (2025), in Illusions of Intimacy, demonstrate that emotional attachment to AI often emerges from perceived understanding rather than genuine reciprocity. AI systems do not experience vulnerability, responsibility or mutual risk.
Ethical analyses reinforce this point. Artificial Intimacy: Ethical Issues of AI Romance (2025) argues that meaningful relationships depend on asymmetry, uncertainty and emotional risk — elements that AI cannot embody. Shakespeare’s tragedies remind us that love’s power lies precisely in its uncertainty.
Communication, Confidence and the Hidden Curriculum of Relationships
Many relationship difficulties arise not from lack of feeling, but from difficulty expressing emotions clearly and respectfully. AI tools increasingly support users in refining language, tone and self-expression.
Lee et al., (2024) show that people often use AI to rehearse conversations and reflect on emotional dynamics, which can increase confidence, especially among individuals with social anxiety or limited experience.
From a VET perspective, this is significant. Communication, emotional intelligence and adaptability are transversal skills essential for employability. The competencies developed through relational learning are closely aligned with those required in teamwork, leadership and service-oriented professions.
Valentine’s Day as a Case Study in everyday AI Literacy
Valentine’s Day illustrates how AI enters everyday decision-making. Planning a meaningful experience requires analysing preferences, managing constraints and anticipating emotional impact. AI can support this process by organising information and suggesting options.
Importantly, AI does not replace intention or emotion. It functions as a decision-support tool, not a decision-maker. Learning to use AI in such everyday contexts strengthens digital literacy and critical judgment — skills equally relevant in professional environments.
Ethical Boundaries: To be or not to be… Dependent?
The ethical debate surrounding AI and relationships echoes Hamlet’s question: “To be, or not to be?” Research shows that people tend to anthropomorphise AI, attributing human qualities where none exist (Human–AI Relationships, 2023). Without education, this can lead to emotional dependency and unrealistic expectations.
Privacy is another concern. Intimate conversations with AI often involve sensitive personal data. Ma et al. (2026) warn that users may not fully understand how such data is stored or processed. These challenges highlight the need for ethical and digital literacy, rather than technological avoidance.
From Valentine’s Day to Skills for the Future
The use of AI in personal contexts reflects broader patterns of human–AI collaboration. The same skills applied in planning a date — reflection, communication and ethical judgment — are essential in the workplace.
Projects such as AI4VET4AI emphasise that future-ready education must go beyond technical AI skills. It must also address emotional intelligence, responsibility and human-centred design. AI should support learning and development, not replace human agency.
Keeping Love Human in a Technological World
Love remains one of the strongest determinants of human life trajectories. AI does not love, but it can support reflection, communication and learning. Used responsibly, AI can help individuals become more aware and confident.
In a world without a formal school for love, AI may act as a temporary tutor. The role of education is to ensure that this tutor is used critically and ethically — always in service of human dignity.
As Shakespeare reminds us, love may be boundless, but it is also profoundly human. Technology should help us understand that — not forget it.
Love remains human.
References
· Chu et al., (2025). Illusions of intimacy: Emotional attachment and emerging psychological risks in human–AI relationships.
· Lee et al., (2024). Finding love in algorithms: Emotional dynamics in human–AI interaction.
· Potential and Pitfalls of Romantic Artificial Intelligence (AI): A Systematic Review. (2025). Computers in Human Behaviour Reports.
· Artificial Intimacy: Ethical Issues of AI Romance. (2025). Trends in Cognitive Sciences.
· Human–AI Relationships: Challenges and Impacts on Human Social Life. (2023). Springer.
